This story was contributed by our friend, Hannah at The Lexingtonienne – ENJOY!
A toddler is like a Border Collie: an adorable, loyal companion who is whip-smart, fun-loving, ridiculously energetic, and who almost always wants to be by your side. And, like a Border Collie, if not kept busy in a constructive way, a toddler will rain destruction upon your home.
I once saw an episode of the Dog Whisperer where Cesar said without a job to keep him busy, a Border Collie would find his own “work,” such as eating holes in the drywall. Similarly, sometimes it feels like my toddler is working… but working against me.
So, I thought, why not get her to work FOR me? With that in mind, I discovered three great ways to employ a toddler and keep things like THIS from happening:
JOB #1: DOCUMENT SHREDDER
I learned from the Dog Whisperer that Border Collies are great at herding because they never tire of running circles around a flock of sheep. Well, Eleanora never tires of ripping up paper. With files full of years-old pay stubs and ancient bank statements just waiting for the house to catch on fire, I’d been meaning to purchase a paper shredder.
But then I realized I already have a shredder! A very talented one who is proficient at ripping up the new US Weekly I haven’t read yet into the tiniest of pieces. With her unique skill set, she’s just the candidate for a job that I, for at least a decade, have considered too tedious to complete.
JOB #2: SWIFFERER
I considered how Border Collies like to bounce through pastures. Unfortunately, we live in a townhouse in the middle of Los Angeles. There are no fields through which to roam free with the wind in your baby mullet. There are no sheep to round up. But… there are dust bunnies to collect! Seeing as my kid is 1) a crumb factory, and 2) o-b-s-e-s-s-e-d with the Swiffer, I handed it over to let her sweep up her own messes.
JOB #3: GARBAGE DISPOSAL
Whether your loyal companion is a Border Collie or a growing toddler, it has to eat. If you’ve spent two seconds on my blog, you know that I like to cook. And I often start the next cooking project before the last one has been eaten. On top of that, I’m excellent at taking leftovers home with me after a Saturday date night, but not so good at ever eating them. As a result, I am constantly cleaning out the fridge, and I realized Eleanora could help.
Chicken Marsala and pan-roasted fingerling potatoes? Works for Eleanora. Snack of sole meuniere and cornichons? Sure! Recently I asked her, “Do you know how many people are having filet mignon and a banana for lunch? [Silence.] One. That’s how many.”
So while my documents were being shredded, my floors cleaned, and my leftovers gobbled up, I found time to make this vitamin-packed smoothie.
It only takes a few minutes, so while your toddler is busy keeping house, try it out.
THE LEXINGTONIENNE‘S BLUEBERRY SMOOTHIE (pdf)
Makes 1 king-size smoothie or 2 princess-size smoothies
NOTE: Measurements are approximate, totally flexible, and should be adjusted as desired.
- 1 C ice cubes
- 1 C frozen blueberries
- 1 C fresh baby spinach leaves (I promise you can’t even taste it.)
- 1/3 to 1/2 of a banana, depending on the size of your banana (No jokes, Adrian.)
- 2 strawberries, stems & leaves removed, hulled, and roughly cut up
- 1/2 C Greek yogurt
- 1/2 C orange juice
Hannah — aka “The Lexingtonienne” — is a wife, mother, cook, photographer, and scrubber of toilets. (Mine, not yours.)
Now that we’ve done our taxes, I seriously love the idea of dumping the tax box from 7 years ago (is that how long you have to hold onto these things or did i make that up?) in from of my daughter and let her go to town. What a win win. My problem is she also likes to eat paper. It’s probably because I’m not giving her enough filet mignon. Which everyone should be eating with a banana amuse bouche.
Hi everybody!
Great post!!! I, too, have learned many parenting tricks from The Dog Whisperer. Ha!! Love your photos…priceless 😉
Awesome post.
I love that!!!!
Cool to see your picture. Love your recipes and play lists. Maureen, Los Angeles
Yes yes, but she needs a little more tutelage on cleaning the bathrooms. See, she needs to insert the end of the tp roll inside the pot, then flush. Easily disposes of all the tp. Oh don’t you worry, she’ll figure that one out…..they all do.
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