I’ve long thought that my wife only wanted kids as an excuse to plan their birthday parties… and I was partially right.
The very first birthday party we (she) planned (for Ava) should have given me some insight into how her mind works, sending me running for cover, terrified about what the future had in store for my fragile, chaos-hating spirit. If you’ve read my book, you’ll know what I’m talking about – with the clown and rabbit with the huge testicles… I’ll leave it at that.
But I expect her to be excited about planning these parties for our kids, it’s only natural.
“Plan” is one word. “Obsess about every tiny detail,” is another… actually it’s a set of words that causes me to start twitching.
Some (normal people, me included) may think that a quiet party with a homemade chocolate cake, questionable icing job, while being surrounded by family is adequate for a kid’s birthday.
My wife’s version of a “quiet party at home” includes a professionally designed smash cakes or a Monster High Science Lab in my living room complete with make-your-own Monster Gak stations…
Doesn’t glue, food coloring and chemicals on your hardwood floors sound awesome? Exactly. That’s what I thought.
We’ve set up Carnivals in the backyard, held pirate-themed treasure hunts (yes, I was walking around my neighborhood leading twenty kids with a sword and an eye patch) with a massive sand pit so the kids could dig for buried treasure. Short of having the Blue Angels fly overhead, I’m pretty sure we’ve done it all.
And that takes me to the final piece of the annoying birthday party puzzle – the goodie bag. When I was a kid, we went to the party, ate a piece of cake and came home. I don’t remember walking in the front door to greet my parents with a prize package that looked like I won ‘The Price is Right’.
My wife has become so swept up in this goodie bag phenomenon, that these things rival Kid’s Choice Awards swag bags.
This time around, for Charlie’s 4th birthday party, I put my foot down. No more cleaning my house for three days, only to watch it crumble to the ground in two hours.
So I suggested the ‘party in a box’.
We LOVE going to them – a party at some sort of event center, where these kids are contained, they have an ‘eye in the sky’ with security cameras and they can burn off energy while you stand around and mingle. Let them jack up someone’s house! Sure, we both enjoy putting our own special touches on these parties, but after this last experience, I’m all for writing a check and taking a step back.
We took a leap of faith in July and had Charlie’s party at an amazing new space in Gaithersburg, MD called SkyZone. And I can tell you…
It. Was. Awesome. Had I known about this place, I would’ve gotten married there. It’s a warehouse full of trampolines. Not just simple trampolines, but one’s that were connected to basketball hoops and foam pits.
Unfortunately, I had my own issues with the foam pit. This is what it looks like when the old guy tries to get out. Apologies for the vertical video.
Check out their ‘Best Birthday Ever Promotion’. If guests book a Super Jump or higher birthday package between September 1st – October 31st they will receive a FREE Jump Card loaded with 4 x 1 hour jump passes. Here’s the link OR just call their location to book at 240-428-1242!
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