Ava Full Of Grace

Some of Ava’s less graceful performances.

Jan21

AVA FULL OF GRACE #8: A HAIRY SITUATION.

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It was only a matter of time. After getting beat down on a daily basis over the last five years, I’ve gotten tired. Some people might call it lazy, but those people can suck it. I prefer tired. I pretty much let my kids do whatever they want these days. Well, not really, but you

Dec11

AVA FULL OF GRACE #7: Put Me In The Game, Coach. I’m Ready.

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Ten years ago, if you wanted to find me on a Sunday, I’d be at O’Briens Irish Pub in Santa Monica, California.  I’d ride my bike there from Marina Del Rey, wearing my Randall Cunningham jersey, donning a foam Philadelphia Eagles helmet. I could do that.  I was in neutral territory.  LA doesn’t have a

Nov6

AVA FULL OF GRACE #6: She’s Driving Me Insane.

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In my 20’s, I was a force to be reckoned with.  I was in superior shape, had great metabolism and could literally eat a handful of dirt and wash it down with a handle of Banker’s Club vodka and go run a marathon. But I’m not 20 anymore.  I’m on the backside of my 30’s,

Mar6

AVA FULL OF GRACE #5: Get To Steppin’.

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Recently Ava is going through this phase where, after we put her and Charlie to bed, she sneaks back down the stairs to see what ‘mommy and daddy time’ is all about.  Maybe she thinks she’s going to stumble in on us making a big heroin deal or having some Eyes Wide Shut party in

Jan29

AVA FULL OF GRACE #4: Snow Your Roll.

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If I wasn’t organized, I would’ve given up a long time ago.  In trying to carry that idea into the various toy and laundry cluttered hallways of my life, I decided to go through the 56,000 pictures on my iPhoto before (my computer blasted a wet fart in the bed) I had passed the point

Nov8

AVA FULL OF GRACE #3: It Puts The Lotion In The Basket.

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Sometimes I feel like I have a perpetual headache.  Not just an occasional sharp pain behind your eyeball here or there, I’m talking about the legitimate feeling that a team of miners were using sharp forks and dynamite to excavate my cranial walls. If it weren’t for the obvious non-stop cacophony of toddler screams, whining,

Oct22

AVA FULL OF GRACE #2: I Used To Be One.

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Last week we were out running errands and all of the sudden….TRUE STORY. AVA:  Daddy, I’m almost 3.  This many. (holds up 3 fingers) DADDY, LOOK AT MY FINGERS! ME:  Ava, I’m driving right now, wait one second until we get to the stoplight. AVA:  And right now I’m two.  This many. WE PULL UP

Oct17

AVA FULL OF GRACE #1: Dance Like No One Is Watching…Or Waiting.

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LAST WEEK DURING BREAKFAST: AVA:  Daddy, I need to get up and do something. ME:  Ava!  PLEASE.  NO.  I’m so tired of the up & down while we’re eating. Your toys will be there when we’re done. You don’t need to put on your rain boots, ‘check on’ the DVDs to make sure they’re still