Apr30

DAD’S IN DEEP SH!T #27 – King Arthur Lives.

3 comments
April 30, 2014 |  by  |  Dad's In Deep Sh!t

Heroes come in all shapes and sizes.

Earlier today, unbeknownst to you, it came in the form of this guy.

adrian star warsUnfortunately, here he is again…

IMG_2111All 6’1″ and 230 pounds of mouth-breathing sexiness with stickers on his face.

He may not look like much, but after making the kids breakfast, packing their lunches and running backpacks to the car…this ‘guy’ realized that his wife and kids had accidentally locked everyone outside…with a newborn in the house, hanging from a door-jamb swing, all alone.

With no spare key, unlocked window or access to dynamite to light up the morning suburbia sky, this devoted parent stopped to focus.

This ‘guy’, is me.

I summoned my life experiences and hours of watching ‘Cops’ in syndication and quickly found the answer. A weighted exercise ‘Body Bar’ that my wife tells me not to throw away because ‘I’m going to use that!’, but never does.

I felt like King Arthur, pulling the heavy staff of metal from the depths of our garage, cluttered with folding lawn chairs and a thousand rolls of gift wrap that won’t go away.

I told my army (disheveled wife, late for work and two toddlers in rain gear, strangling yogurt tubes) to ‘BACK UP!’ as I prepared to become included in EVERY. SINGLE. PARENTING. HISTORY. BOOK. EVER.

It only took two blows (that’s what she said) to compromise the heavy steel door.

My wife ran inside and the kids cheered.

Adrian busts down doorMason had no clue that I had just saved his life (or two hours of mental anguish, watching him through the window, sitting in a door-jamb swing, before a locksmith arrived)…

Mason waits for help…but rest assured, it’s now on the internet. So he’ll find out…eventually.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:  Adrian Kulp is a blogger, author, TV producer and full-time stay-at-home dad.  His first book for Penguin Publishing, a comedic parenting memoir, debuted in May of 2013.  He currently writes Dad or Alive, as well as for The Huffington Post.  He’s a member of Target’s Inner Circle and a contributor to Kids in the House.  He most recently produced ‘Modern Dads’ for A&E and moderated a panel on fatherhood at Dad Summit 2.0 in New Orleans in January of 2014. He enjoys long walks on the beach and using the bathroom for more than five minutes without an audience.

 

2 comments
jacauline
jacauline

........ like Heather explained I did not even know that someone able to get paid  $8128 in 1 month on the internet.......If you think Heather`s story is good,, last pay check my brother's girlfriend basically brought home $6552  putting in a fourteen hour week at home and their co-worker's step-mother  done this for nine months and brought home more than $6552 in there spare time at there PC. .....



see this link..................... www.atanycost.tk

ChrisBernholdt
ChrisBernholdt

Once, my two kids purposely locked me out when I went out for the mail and then the door stuck and she was too weak to get it back open. I used the code on the garage to get in there, but the screen door was locked. I had just installed it and wasn't about to crash through it unless it was an emergency. Talked my 4 year old through unlatching the hook and eyes on top and bottom like a hostage negotiator. It happens to the best of us!

Trackbacks

  1. […] Van de reeks ‘Dad’s in deep shit’ van Dad or alive: King Arthur Lives. […]